Part 3 of 3
At the end of September, I greet a cheerfully smiling Dionne. It has now been more than a month since we worked with EMDR. Full of enthusiasm, she says that things are going very well. She enjoys driving again, even on highways. She does not experience any tension. The longest part of the journey to Italy was not driven by her boyfriend, but by Dionne, herself. And, she enjoyed it. ‘I don’t understand what happened. Without thinking, I just got into the car and took the shortest route. I have my freedom back! I also have more energy. And, not only because of the wonderful holiday’, she says with a laugh.
‘What a fantastic success story, Dionne!’ I exclaim. I was deeply moved by the visible change in her. She radiates from ear to ear, her shoulders back, as if taking up more space. It gives me goosebumps. We are both silent for a moment.
How is it possible that something that bothered you for 10 years suddenly disappeared? What really contributed to this change? How is it possible that one client reacts like Dionne and another needs much more time for it or never gets rid of a specific fear?
I can unleash all kinds of hypotheses on this. Inside, I hear a voice that says: ‘Don’t you know yet that things like this happen. You reached your conclusion too quickly. You pretend that everything is possible, don’t you?’
‘I didn’t expect, Dionne, that you’d go through this change in such a short period of time,’ I continue out loud. She smiles with satisfaction.
At the moment, things are going so well that she sees no reason to work with EMDR on other painful experiences.
Not long ago, I would have discussed with her that it would probably do her good if she emptied her ‘backpack’ some more. That is why I visited all kinds of therapists and coaches for years in the hope that I would continue to feel better.
I don’t believe in this anymore. From experience, I know that it is early enough to pay attention to something if I suffer too much from it in everyday life. In addition, changing perspective is sometimes the easiest and quickest way to feel good. More about that another time.
Tomorrow, Dionne will put on her police uniform again. She has scheduled a meeting with her supervisor with the aim of identifying her limits and expressing her needs. ‘I’m going to do it differently,’ she says firmly.
When she walks out the door I think to myself, ‘Dionne is going to live her freedom.’